10 Reasons Knitting is the Skill Set for the Zombie Apocalypse

 Okay– you all see the lovely woman standing on my right?  That’s Deborah Cooke/Claire Delacroix, and she’s lovely, funny, bright as hell, and we did a meet and greet today.  Not many people came, but I was thrilled to be in the same room with her, and we had fun.  I presented ten reasons Knitting is the Skill Set for the zombie Apocalypse during the event, and Claire said, “Somebody MUST blog it!” and so I will present it at the end of this post!

So, a quick, random run-through of some of the other events in pictures…

Poppy and Amy on the first night– they’re good friends and adorable, and I loved them!  We are in Denny’s, and there WAS magic there, and we just fested on carbs… t’was grand!

Here we have Damon Suede and Amy again, having an amazing conversation about literature that I was privileged to be a part of!  One of those fun things that people come to cons for, honestly.  Twas awesome.

Over here, we have a selfie, me and Damon– he is laughing because he has figured out the secret of selfies– don’t look up, because then people can see your extra chin AND whatever is inside your nose!

And here, we have Precious Paranormal Poppy Denison, who was my companion much of the weekend.  She promised Mary-my-Mary that she would look out for me, because we all KNOW how I can get when surrounded by shiny squirrels, and she has done an admirable job.  She is currently wearing Squish’s scarf hat which I finished when I arrived.  Squish is thrilled– I can’t wait to give it to her!

Over here, we have a late night round table at the character ball… from left to right, TC Blue– who is lovely and awesome as always, our friend Chudney, and Damon Suede, looking as exhausted as I feel, and holding court.  Also at that table was Damon’s fun and awesome friend Lyla, the wonderful and ever so helpful Taylor Law, and you can see T.C. Blue once again (which is always a very good thing!)

Oh– some other things that happened?

#CMCC TRENDED on Twitter the other night, as we panned the perfectly dreadful movie, Little Red Riding Hood.  Live tweeting during a bad movie is sort of damned hysterical.  I hope this becomes a party fad for college students everywhere, because… too much fun!


We won Flash Fiction.  I mean the whole table won Flash Fiction:  Damon Suede, Alex Hughes, Lucien Diver, Kiernan Kelly, Angie Fox and I had an amazing time making up stories that ranged from T-Rexes and turkeys to Mermaphrodites on Pizza.  Seriously we made shit up on the spot– I think we all had at least two or three moments of totally winning the show which meant that the entire panel was raucous and exciting and awesome.  WOOT!  (ETA– I changed “Alicia Fox” to “Angie Fox” because I am a dork fish and got it wrong– SORRY SO MUCH Angie!)


I got to have dinner with Damon and our agent, Saritza Hernandez, which was delightful, because she’s GREAT, and we never get to see enough of her!

And that brings me to the meet and greet– and the top ten reasons that knitting is go to survival skill for the zombie apocalypse…

Number 10–

Pointy sticks make excellent weapons.

Number 9–

String can be make very effective traps.

Number 8–

Knitter’s stash makes effective house insulation for those pesky power outages.

Number 7–

Wool is self-extinguishing–which comes in handy when your city is on fire.

Number 6–

If you realize you’re doomed to become a zombie anyway, you can knit yourself a market bag for body parts and start your new life as a living undead ghoul with some preparation.

Number 5–

It is possible to knit a hammock, and we all know zombies can’t climb trees.

Number 4–

Acrylic yarn melts.  Melting your old embarrassing stash to create a polyethylene armor to protect against zombie bites is a thoughtful way to recycle.

Number 3–

You can’t run away with blisters on your feet.  New socks are important.

Number 2–

Cotton washcloths are good for sopping up blood.

Number 1–

You can also knit sweaters and blankets.

And that’s the end of the show for today, folks… on Monday, I’ll be coming home, but not before a walk on the beach and a chance to say goodbye to the awesome folks here at the con.


0 thoughts on “10 Reasons Knitting is the Skill Set for the Zombie Apocalypse”

  1. roxie says:

    What IS a mermaphrodite?

  2. roxie says:

    Mermaphrodites on pizza? You mean, pizza with mermaphrodites sprinkled on top, or mermaphrodites eating pizza and achieving an altered state?

  3. roxie says:

    YOu just boggle my mind, you creative tornado!

  4. Julia says:

    now I have to crochet a hammock

  5. bethtrue says:

    Did someone say Blood? I love reading about these conferences – the authors that attend – seeing the photos and hearing the stories!! So much fun; I hope that I can attend something like that someday… what a dream that would be.

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