A Pinch of This or That

1.  ZoomBoy had a soccer game today– they tied, 4-4, but the best moment by far was watching Mate when they were down 3-0.  He buried his face in his arms and wished for teleportation– I could tell, and I was across the arena.  He popped up though, and the boys rallied, but he doesn’t often show despair. I was charmed.

2.  The dogs and I rambled for a mile and a quarter, and yet, at eleven o’clock at night, they were all-systems go and “LET’S GET READY TO RUMMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLEEE!!!!”  I have a clear image of Geoffie hauling ass down the hallway, riding the rug to slam into the wall, and then tumbling back to haul ass back into the living room, tongue flying behind her, so she could body tackle her nemesis, Jonnie. Now, Mary-my-Mary has actually HEARD the noises Jonnie makes when they’re fighting. He sounds like a Peanuts character getting kneed in the groin. I have no other way to describe it. On the whole? It’s high hilarity–but the kids have learned to fall asleep to the soothing strains of small-dog WWF cage matches in the living room. Bodes well for life in the dorms.

3.  TOMORROW IS A DAY OFF!  I asked Mate if he wants to A. Go to the movies or B. Clean out the garage.  I have the feeling that at around 1:00 pm, it’s going to be C. Get the hell off the couch, for anything, dammit, anything, let’s just not sit around here again!

4. The M/M group on GR announced their yearly awards today, and I won some incidentals, but Mary-my-Mary KICKED ASS with a Hall-of-Fame victory, and Rhys Ford did CONSIDERABLY well for herself, and seriously, I’m just going to park my weak ass next to them and bask in their glow. *pulls up a chair*  C’mon, bask with me. They won’t mind. They’re such awesome people, they’ll share all the glow they got.

5.  My dad came to watch ZB play, and he sat next to me as I was sitting next to the soccer mom mafia, and he must have felt a little intimidated, because he was very well behaved and didn’t try to provoke me at all. It wasn’t until we got outside and I pointed to the Supernatural medallion (the one they use to ward off possession) on the back of the minivan (to ward off repossession.) Now, I put stuff on the back of my minivans mostly for identification, because we buy standard vehicles and it makes them easier to spot in parking lots. Of course, the last minivan got pretty political by the end —-if anyone remembers the post where the guy I accidentally cut off stuck his head out of the passenger’s side of his van and screamed “YOU FUCKING CUNT OBAMA IS A FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!”  as we drove side by side down the street.  Also, post-its on my windshield. Also, my parents yelling at me for supporting Obamacare.  Even when it proved to be a success.  So, Mate, not wanting his children to be endangered by our liberalism in this fucking GOP conservative redneck cesspool, asked for me to keep our politics off the back of the vehicle. The SPN medallion is it, and it playfully points to us as pagans and liberals, but only to people who also watch the show.

  But my dad, wishing to jerk my chain, saw the sticker and said, “I’m going to get a bumper sticker that says ‘Nuke Syria.'”

“Bad daddy!”

“No! It’s going to say, ‘Nuke the entire Middle-East!'”

“ZoomBoy, everything your grandfather says about politics is bad. All of it. Pure bullshit. Listen to Comedy Central before you listen to grandpa.”

My dad cackled like he’d done his job, but my kid is no fool.  He’s going to watch Chris Hardwick and Trevor Noah tomorrow and realize that grandpa is a crazy old coot, and I am going to get the last laugh.

Until I have grandchildren of my own, of course–if my parents’ generation doesn’t kill us all before that!

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