And Today in Oddments

School’s in session, glory be,
There will be time, time for me!
Time to write and time to read,
Animals to pet and feed!
Lunch to choose all by myself
Clothes to put away on a shelf.
Floors to mop and dishes to wipe,
(Let’s not forget the time to write!)
Cats to pet and dogs to walk
Long neglected friends to talk
Net to surf, clothes to buy
(Must stop that–Mate’s asking why
I’d possibly need some brand new shoes
In yet another shade of blue.)
I can play music while I sit
(Cartoons were giving me a facial tic)
And finally, finally, space in my head
So I can remember what my characters said.
And here I am, I’ve had a snack,
It’s time to work, dog’s in my lap,
I’ve done away with extraneous crap,
Just me and my laptop, and my mental map
Of shit that I must do…
I must…
I must…
I must…
Oh hell.  I think I really must nap.


So, now that that’s out of the way, some catchup to do.

First of all– Friday will be my big, “Why I wrote this book and how much do I hope you love it!” for Beneath the Stain.  The first installment will be out on Friday, and I’m SO remembering how much I’ve dreaded book releases in the past.  Especially this one.  For one thing, it’s coming out in sections, and I know I”m going to have a hard time looking at the GR ratings.  People will go, “Well, it was good, but not as developed as an entire novel,” without looking to see that it’s intentionally part of an entire work, and that’s going to drive me crazy, but also, I just put so much into this.  I’ve got a big Facebook chat on Saturday, but after that, Mate, the kids, and I are going to the ocean for a few days, and I think that’s a good thing.  It’s going to keep me off the internet and out of trouble, and, of course it’s going to be at the ocean, and that’s one of my favorite places to be.

So there’s that.

Also, I’m eyeballs deep in Immortal, which is killing me softly.  And not so softly.  I’m writing this one as sort of an apology to the spouses of artists everywhere, and the more I write it the more I want to sob on Mate’s shoulders and say “Thank youuuuuuu…” because it’s not easy being married to someone who can’t turn their job off ever, and is neurotic, self-obsessed, and dependent on their neuroses and self-obsession for bringing in income.

So yeah– looking in the mirror is uncomfortable for me at the best of times, this book in particular, I think.


Yes, I did the ice bucket challenge last week, and I posted it on FB (So, yanno, you can skip this if you’ve already seen it, because although I love this T-shirt, I also know it’s not a good look for me.)  PLEASE forgive the part where I’m a dinkus and said Alzheimers instead of ALS– I knew what the ice bucket challenge was for, I just spazzed out on camera.  Frankly, I wanted it over with, because in my neighborhood, there’s nothing like a family standing out on their drought ridden lawn to bring onlookers and/or the police.

Anyway– so, you know.  Proof.

By the way- this whole challenge thing inspired Chicken to write a heartbreaking short story about the effects of ALS on a family, and it was good, and it made me cry fucking buckets and I showed it to her father, and he teared up.  It’s only 5K, M/M romance, but I want her to publish it somewhere.  Heck– If she’d let me I’d put it up on the blog.  It’s beautiful, and I”m proud and heartbroken at the same time.  She looked at a seemingly abstract thing and made it human.  It’s all I’ve ever asked of my children, and she succeeded beautifully.

Also out on FB but not on the blog, is the following conversation I had with Zoomboy:

We have in our garage an “outside cat.” She started out on the inside but she has resisted ALL attempts at house training, and although she’s VERY sweet, she needs to stay in the garage, where the cat box doesn’t frighten her. Sometimes, Zoomboy goes outside to talk to this cat– we call her Shulamonster. Tonight on the way back from soccer practice, Zoomboy and I had the following conversation:
ZB: Mom, it’s too bad Schula can’t come inside.
Me: Yeah, really is.
ZB: And too bad we don’t take her to the vets anymore.
Me: Yeah. It is. But she’s too wild. She lets us pet her and that’s about it.
ZB: She’s really sweet.
Me: Yeah.
ZB: She bit me today, but it was an accident. Don’t worry, I washed it with hot water and bactine.
Me: Okay… she bit you?
ZB: Yes. It was an *accident*. Not her fault. Not her fault at all.
Me: Okay.
ZB: It’s too bad we couldn’t, you know, find her a way for her to poop somewhere else but the floor.
Me: (getting a little suspicious by now) Yes. Yes it is.
ZB: Like, you know, a diaper. Like one of the ones we used to get for the dog when he was a baby.
Me: *lightbulb* Zoomboy?
ZB: Yes?
Me: Did you try to put one of the dog’s old diapers on the cat? Is that why she bit you?
ZB: Yes.
Me: Ooooooooooohhhh… That explains SO much!


And for today’s finale, there’s the story of Gordie and the vet.

Okay, it’s not much of a story.

Mostly, the frickin’ cat just managed not to go to the vet’s.  Twice.  So this morning, before Big T left for school, I asked him to put the cat in the cat carrier, I didn’t care how early it was, I wasn’t going to risk him slipping out.  

I didn’t hear what happened next.  I swear.  I didn’t see it, didn’t hear it, all I heard was Mate, exclaiming, “Did you just hit the cat with the ceiling fan?  No wonder he hates you!”

o.o  I don’t even want to know.


And I only thought that was the finale.  (This is a much better finale– I promise.  This one has available pictures!)

See– I’ve been ordering swag, so I expect deliveries every so often, and yes, I do check to see what’s being delivered.  

I’ve gotten Johnnies keychains, Angst & Pain dragon buttons, Mackey refrigerator magnets, Mackey lanyards (pending) and some magnets and buttons for The Bells of Times Square.  So, today as I was writing, imagine my surprise when I opened a box and found these:

No, your eyes do not deceive you.  Those are Jehovah’s Witness pins.  I called the company and they get 30-40 orders of these a day, so they’re just going to eat the cost and re-send.  I told him the next time the JW’s come knocking, I’ll tell them we’d been expecting them, their God sent us the pins by mistake.  

As you can see, I usually get a different kind of swag altogether!

0 thoughts on “And Today in Oddments”

  1. Unknown says:

    Oh Amy, my precious Amy…Fate, The Exalted Ones and the Joy of Chaos have just granted you the Ultimate Gift BACK to They Who Knock Unremittingly…."Have YOU Heard the Good News About Johnnies?"

    Love ya!

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