Blogger is a cheeze-eating bitch-slapping arse-wanking git.


If you’re wondering what’s got my dander up about our be (HA) loved muse vehicle, it’s that the @#$@#%^&%$ piece of @#$ won’t let me COMMENT ON ANYBODY’S BLOG!!! Or, I should say, on SOME of your blogs. It’s so frustrating…I’ll read someone’s blog, and have something…well, not brilliant–not this week, anyway–but at least, uhngh, you know…COHERENT, and I go to enter it and…and nada. Of course it may not be blogger–it may be my stupid computer, because my G-mail has gotten hairier than a Himalayan cat’s patootie–but ya know what? Don’t care. Don’t FUCKING care. (There. My first curse word for the post–yee ha! I DO remember how to swear, I DO I DO I DO!!!) I’m so fed up by electronics that think I work for THEM that really? Blogger and G-mail can go rot in the ass of that fourth demon under the sixth rock south of hell. (I’ve used that expression often enough that I’m really gonna have to map out hell, to make sure I don’t sentence , say, blogger and the ex-grand-royal-prickweenie to share the same space. Blogger, after all, is only a machine…) Anyway, I’ve been to SEVERAL blogs over the day…Bells? Mad mad? Julie? Yeah, I’m talking to you… and a few other people that I sort of randomly visit…Louiz? I think I’ve been over your way… Mother of Chaos–yeah, I took a look! Anyway, about the only blog that let me post was Roxie’s (wouldn’t miss you for the world, darling!!!) and our beloved Harlot. Everybody else, you’ll just have to take my word for it–I was there, and you got no comments. Sad but true.

Anyway, other than that, and a few cute kids stories? Nothing to report. Isn’t it BLISSFUL? Seriously–I’ve barely written (which is not altogether a good thing, I know) but what’s happened in the last week is is the total lack of that chest-crunching, neck-pinching, nerve-torquing DRIVE to be doing something that marks the state of NOT being on vacation almost more than the total lack of time to do any of those things that you’re DRIVEN to do! Hell–even being broke has been relaxing. I’ve COOKED. (Not well, but my family has A. Me, or B. Fast food. Guess what? I’m actually better than option B. Who knew?) And I’ve slept in, and, well, pootered around the house and barely kept it somewhere above aboriginal in terms of cleanliness and…relaxed. I’ve knit. I finished socks for Ladybug and started another pair toes-up… (hee hee hee…I’ll be able to tell the students at school that these socks are toe-up!!! It makes more sense when you say it, trust me…) and none of them are HAVE TO projects–I’ll do some of those next week, but really? I’ve spent a week doing nothing much but watching my kids be cute. It’s been AWESOME. I can not say how much…oh, wait. Maybe I can.

I was sitting in the living room, watching Reaper (excellent show!!!) and knitting, when Ladybug wandered in. Now the last time I’d seen her, she was supposed to be in bed, wearing candy-striped footie pajamies (it’s gotten very cold here lately…it’s weird!) but not now. Now she is naked. She smiles at me, hands me her (wet) diaper and says, “Here mom, take this. Thank you. Oooh…Kewyn’s toy! Mine now!” And with that, she wanders into the hall with Kewyn’s light saber, jabbering the tune to Star Wars (no, I’m not making this up!!! Yes, she does talk that well–have I mentioned she’s SCARY FREAKING SMART?) While in the hallway (as I was throwing away the aforementioned diaper, grabbing a new one, and finding her pj’s) she looked into her older sister’s room, where she decided to chase the cat off the bed with the light saber before I caught her and carried her back into the living room, laughing all the way.

Now, I’m not sure what I would have made of this moment last week–I’m not. Most of the time I can pull my sense of humor out of my shoes even when I’m wiped out…but I know that tonight, now that she’s (FINALLY) asleep, it was hella fucking cute.

Vacation–it’s not just for insane trips to places you can’t name:-)

0 thoughts on “Blogger is a cheeze-eating bitch-slapping arse-wanking git.”

  1. Isn’t spring break the best?

  2. roxie says:

    The best vacations are the ones when you have the time to be happy.

    Teach her to put the wet and/or dirty diaper in the bucket, and put a clean one on and you are mom of the century! And get it on tape for the funniest home videos. And extra 10 thou might come in handy.

    Sorry to hear the budget crunches are hitting your home too. That sucks rocks!!

  3. Catie says:

    I can’t think of anything eloquent or insightful to write as a comment but I wanted you to know I was here.

  4. Galad says:

    Blissful seems like a wonderful word for spring break. Glad to hear you are using it to enjoy yourself and take a well deserved vacation.

  5. I’m SO digging that we have a whole other week!

  6. Donna Lee says:

    Blogger doesn’t always let me leave comments either. At least I was blaming blogger and then I found out it was my stupid ass fire wall. It also didn’t let me sent out email. I am so glad you are relaxing. Let your soul breathe for a while. I have never laughed at anyone or anything as hard as I laugh at/with my children. Emily had me laughing so hard on the phone last week that I broke blood vessels around my eyes.

  7. NeedleTart says:

    I was kinda wondering where you were.
    In the schaunderfreude category, I have been reading Jim Butcher’s Codex Alera series and in the first chapter he says “…they had only a few more days to plow and sew…”. Sure. And he has a professional editor. Do you think Ace books would be interested?

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