Blogging is the ultimate evil?

No, no, no–that’s BLOGGER is the ultimate evil. Lewis Black got it wrong.

Seriously–I’m listening to Lewis Black right now, doing his ‘versus’ program which is really pretty fucking hilarious, except now bloggers are on the chopping block against ultimate fighting, and I’m getting all defensive. All I really want to do is send Patton Oswald a note that says, “I DO NOT SPELL ‘RULES’ WITH A ‘Z'”, and then I’ll get over it. But really, Ultimate Fighting should lose–because I said so, that’s why.

Anyway–I’m off to school tomorrow to decorate my room and make my copies and basically remember my damned day job. I’m thinking it might not suck this year (as I do every year–it’s the same self-defense mechanism that makes it possible for complete morons like me to go through more than one labor without heavy drugs) because I’ve got some ideas to make it not suck, and I’m looking forward to trying those puppies out. I also now know to treat sophomores like rabid meat bees instead of tamed, drugged goldfish, and I think that might help. So will locking up all of my valuables and running out of school like a meth-powered demented bat from the depths of a demon’s ass in hell at the beginning of lunch. So see–it will all be good.

And this picture thing is really pissing me off!!! I’m just dumbfounded that every time I try to post a picture it takes a half an hour for the fucker NOT to post. People keep telling me to ‘compress’ my photos. That’s an interesting concept. I wonder how people do that. No, no, don’t try to explain. The more I write the more my math logic becomes closer to a stoned moth’s flight pattern than real math, and I have the feeling that an explanation for ‘how to compress photos’ will look, to me, like an excuse to stare at my ott-light and go ‘ooooooo…pretty…’.

And other than that? Well, one funny thing. Ladybug has been making me crazy all summer–she wants to see ‘mahna mahna’ on you-tube. . I’ve let her watch it because, hey, it’s a bizarre form of baby crack and I am not immune, but I had forgotten completely about our secret weapon. We have Season 1 of the the Muppet Show on dvd–and she found it.

So I put it in the dvd player, and Chicken is unrelentingly positive. “I don’t know if it’s on this one. I don’t know if she’ll see it. She’ll be all disappointed.” And I was like, “Hey–just let her watch it and let’s see what happens.”

And first there was the Muppet Show theme song–which Ladybug recognized from youtube, and there was much rejoicing.

And then, there it was. The first number on the first show on the first disc. MAHNA-MAHNA. And Ladybug lost her mind, dancing on the frickin’ bed. It was beeyoootiful–one of my top five moments of the summer.

And now, since the requisite half an hour to get my pictures published is up, I must go and finish my M/M romance short story–a friend and I have already decided that I suck at erotica, so it’s just a romance. With some hot mansex. (As Chicken said, “I know what that story is about mom. It’s what you always write about. Gay guys and vampires.” Well, yeah?) I’ve only got about fifteen pages to go–the, uhm, aforementioned hot sexin ones, and, well, I’ve been waiting for two years to write a super hot sex scene. It’s like Sexmas! So here goes–Merry Sexmas to me!