Damned Offspring

So I was taking Big T home after he came over and did laundry, and as usual, he used the time to tell me how his life is going.

The conversation went like this:

Big T: *general discussion about making friends through a gaming server*

Me: That’s nice, honey! You’ve done fun stuff with these guys?

Big T: Yeah! Also, I’ve been to some of the music clubs downtown!

Me: That’s wonderful.

Big T: I sort of met a group of people there. I met one of the girls through a dating app.

Me: But you met a group of people?

Big T: Yes. It was fun.

Me: How wonderful!  (Everything’s wonderful to mommy, yes oh yes it is!)

Big T: Also, you should sort of know, that the girl I met. I”m dating her.

Me: *less brightly*  You have a girlfriend?

Big T: Yeah. We saw each other a couple of times. She’s coming over next week. I’m cleaning the house for her.

Me *a little stunned because my spawn has once again buried the lede*: So it’s getting serious.

Big T: Yeah. I wasn’t going to tell you at first, but then she told me we should just make it official that we’re dating.

Me *thinking Really?*:  So that’s when you decided to tell me?

Big T: No. She changed her status on FaceBook, and so I did too, because I didn’t want her to think I wasn’t committed.

Me: So that’s when you decided to–

Big T: Grandma and Grandpa saw it. I didn’t want you to hear it from them.

Me: Ass. Hole.

Big T: I’m sorry?

Me: Seriously?

Big T: *sighs* I’m sorry.

Me: This is so making the blog.

Big T: Fine.

Me: If I’d heard it from grandma and grandpa, you would have been on your own for laundry.

Big T: Yeah okay.