Dear family–
I’m sorry.
Yes, I am aware that the evil broccoli is evil, and has always been evil, and yet I still persist in trying to sneak it into your food.
Last night was an abomination.
I don’t know what I was thinking.
Yes, I know the teriyaki chili sauce is very tasty on both chicken and vegetables, but it was wrong of me to toss the steamed broccoli in with the teriyaki chicken in the vain hope that nobody would notice.
You all obviously noticed, and let your displeasure be known.
It was also wrong of me to tell you that this was the chicken we had to eat when your father is very capable of making his own, untainted chicken with barbecue sauce and no evil spicy chili teriyaki that is so very tempting to veggies.
And of course, everything does taste better with bread.
So I was remiss in my duty of serving you protein that had no foul taint of the wicked green within it, and I am very sorry.
Please stop hissing at me like vampires.
I’ll never do it again.
Sincerely,
Mom
