First there’s bricks, then purple twinkies…

then flying monkeys, and then…

Well, let’s just say my stomach hasn’t been happy in this last week and leave it at that. This morning, I ditched the workout regimen and the housecleaning resolutions, and slept with Squish on my lap for two hours, while my dehydrated body recapped a little bit of snoozola.

It was nice.

And then I went to the yarn store, and chatted with Babetta, who loves me, and that was nice too, but the best part of that? It gave me a break from Squish.

See, Squish is a blessing in a lot of ways. She’s smart, she’s vocal, she’s fun, she’s vocal, she has a good heart, she’s vocal, she’s funny, she’s vocal, she’s active, she’s vocal, she’s charming, she’s vocal…

Uhm… you get the picture.

Let’s just say that spending enforced time with Squish is making me appreciate the silent vortex of my own thoughts… at least the only conversations that happen in my own noggin are ones that I can steer!

But today is the last day of soccer for Squish, at least, and that’s wonderful– that takes our soccer days from five to three, and *whew* I can almost dream about breathing again! (Whoopie!) Zoomboy and Chicken are unfazed by this… soccer is neither the thing that drives them nor feeds their souls… but it does teach them all sorts of good things, like how not to beat the crap out of the kid that just pissed them off, and that’s always a useful lesson.

And the game itself was cold and rainy, which doesn’t sound exciting, but since it was ninety degrees until last week, it actually, kinda was.

Anyway…

Steve the cat keeps trying to escape into the garage. I’m not sure what to do to get her to stop doing this, because, the thing is, *whisper* THE BAAAAAAADDD cats are there.

Yes, it’s true. We have two cats in the garage, who, during the house reorganization of 2004, decided they didn’t want a fucking thing to do with us. Since the damned things hated us when they lived here, and chose to have as their only talent, the ability to crap twice their bodyweight anywhere BESIDES the catbox, we sent them to the garage, where they have lived, happily hating our guts, for the last six years.

Steve adores them. Steve wants to learn bad cat habits, like sitting and scowling, hiding under the shevles, and sleeping on the clothes meant for Goodwill.

This morning, after Steve’s third escape, I did the unforgivable. I actually grabbed my precious Steve BY THE TAIL to get her back in the house. She has been glaring at me ever since.

Guys, I hate to say it, but should I not blog for a couple of days, there’s only one reasonable reason why:

The damned cat killed me in my sleep.

Everyone cross their fingers–even Steve may find forgiveness in her fuzzy little black (& white) heart…


0 thoughts on “First there’s bricks, then purple twinkies…”

  1. Chris says:

    Don't do it, Steve!

  2. roxie says:

    She'll hate you up till the moment the can is opened. Then she'll become your best friend again.

    (Purple twinkies? My gawd woman, what have you been eating?)

    Wait till the Squish turns 13. You'll be lucky to get a sullen grunt and an eye-roll out of her, and you'll long for these carefree, chatty days.

    Have you tried long monologues to bore her to sleep?

  3. Catie says:

    Cats seem easy to bribe – a bit of tuna would work wonders for my kitties growing up (my current ones are more motivated by attention). It sounds like it might be a worthwhile investment.

    What did I miss in the Squish saga – why is she at home more – you said something about not being able to go to daycare?

  4. Louiz says:

    Hope you're all feeling better now. Hope Steve lets you live. Hope you get some quiet (I know what a vocal child is like, you have my sympathy).

  5. DecRainK says:

    Catnip works every time . . . . or you could always sic Squish on Steve. Two birds, one stone? lol

  6. Donna Lee says:

    We've had some intestinal difficulties this week as well. It makes doing the biweekly grocery shopping a bit of a trial.

    Cats are weird creatures at best. They're a lot like teenagers. Weren't the 'bad' kids more interesting when you were a teen?

  7. Maybe you should fear Squish and Steve working together.

  8. Julie says:

    I've been known to grab handsfull of Sekhmet's loose skin/fur and drag her around.

    It's a miracle we're both still alive.

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