I blame public television because…

* I walked in on the short people as they were watching Kim Possible, and Ladybug was on Cave Troll’s back giving a two hand yank on the kid’s underwear. Yup, you guessed it– Disney taught my three year old the power wedgie.

* The teenagers and I spent a giddy five minutes coming up with acronyms for swear words. The movie Madagascar gave us ‘Sugar Honey Ice Tea’, Big T gave us ‘Fricking Uncle Cracker King’, and Chicken came up with ‘Cracker Rice Arsenic Pee’– but I was the genius who developed ‘Good Orangutuangs Don’t Dick Around Mentally Masturbating In Trees.’

* Ladybug fell asleep today after rolling off a big stuffed dog and into the corner of the living room next to the toy chest. When I told her father this, he looked around Chiquita the dog and said, “I didn’t see her. The dog was in the way.”

I looked at the giant stuffed St. Bernard she was underneath. “Two, in fact.” That got me a smile from a very tired Mate–not poetry, but it was all good.

0 thoughts on “I blame public television because…”

  1. Don't forget: dorks under managers banter about senseless statements.

    Isn't it amazing how kids can fall asleep anywhere?

  2. Donna Lee says:

    Good acronyms. I'd bet the short ones figure it out pretty quickly, though. They're too smart.

  3. roxie says:

    You need an acronym for crap? I thought crap was an acceptable expletive.

    The buglet is ready for life if she already knows how to give a power wedgie. The only question: is life ready for her?

    Welcome home!

  4. Galad says:

    Power wedgies can be an important life skill!

    The acronyms were great. Sounds like a fun time.

  5. DecRainK says:

    LOl I love Disney…. it offers fun alternatives for swearing. I now find myself saying Sweet Niblets.

    I love the stories/quips you tell about your kids…. you all be as crazy as my family. So nice to know we aren't alone out there 😛

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