Tomorrow I leave for San Diego, but, Goddess bless it, not alone, and I am thrilled! I am swinging through Davis to get the awesome and snarky Mr. Chris Koehler, and then we’re heading for Turlock to get the lovely and outrageously fun Ms. Kim Fielding. Together, we shall road trip it down to San Diego, just us, our luggage, and swag. (It has occurred to me that I have more than my share of swag and luggage. My shame is great.)
Anyway– I bring you the following bits from a very busy day:
Squish: Mom, do you think reality inhibits creativity?
Mom: Why are you naked in the bedroom while I’m packing?
* * *
Mate: So, what did you need from the All-Shit store when I come back from my meeting?
Me: Azo. Any kind you can find.
Mate: You’re going on a trip to San Diego tomorrow?
Me: Yup.
Mate: That could be the saddest thing I’ve ever heard.
* * *
Chicken: No, I’m not fired. I just smoked us all out of the restaurant–but they said I’m not fired!
Me: 0.0
* * *
Big T: Sure I’ll cook dinner. You want ground beef and shredded potatoes and vegetables, right?
Me: Right.
A few minutes later…
Big T: So… squash. Does squash count as a vegetable.
Me: Unless it’s butternut.
T: Okay.
A few minutes later…
T: What constitutes a butternut squash.
Me: The squash in the fridge was a butternut squash.
T: I think I won’t put that in the dinner pot.
Me: Good idea.
(btw– he did a really good job with everything else. Very tasty!)
* * *
Zoomboy, watching @midnight with Chris Hardwick: Mom, what’s a dildo?
Mate: We’re just not talking about that tonight.
ZB: Cool.
A few minutes later:
ZB: So, better debate questions?
Me: Yup, that’s the hashtag war.
ZB: Why are dogs.
Me: Perfect.
* * *
Me: “Yes, this Amy Lane.”
Kinko’s/FedEX: “Yes, Ms. Lane, we have your banner and your copies?”
Me: Oh holy CRAP I totally forgot about that.
Kinko’s: Well, we’ll hold it for another three months.
Me: But I need it THIS WEEK.
Kinko’s: Oh. So, tomorrow or–
Me: Tonight. I’m leaving RIGHT NOW.
* * *
And wish us luck and safe driving, and hope the little dogs are okay with out me.
And the humans.
Oh!
It’s about time the cats got their own article! Thanks BookTaster!
