Oh, Guess What I Can Do?

Now, I know this is going to come as a surprise to some of you, because I don’t post about it that much, especially lately, but sometime in the last ten years (get this!) I. Have Learned. To KNIT!!!

Now don’t let it shock you or anything–and I know you won’t really believe it until you see it, so, to that end (are you sitting down?) I. Have. Pictures. Really–pictures of knitting, on the internet. Be still our beating hearts.

Of course, the pictures are pretty crappy, because the Cave Troll took them… (at least I’d like to pretend he did–it’s no secret I have the most craptacular pictures on the internet) but you can see that, besides the self-striping vanilla socks that have been my stand-by stoplight project for almost a year (if you count the better part of a pair that got stolen with my i-Pod), I have indulged in an orgy of casting on…but first, a word from my pushers…I mean enablers…I mean dear, dear internet friends who have sent me yarn from afarn…(No, that doesn’t really work, does it…) Anyway…

To the left front of the chair you will see a wound skein of Queasy Iguana and an unwound skein of STR in Monsoon, both from Rae, who, in a green word, ROCKS OUT LOUD. The Queasy Iguana (dyed by our Samurai, of course) is going to be my next CO–Chicken has asked for fingerless mitts, and I aim to please.(It’s too bad they’re going to end up in her closet or as rat-bedding, but at least I can say I made them, right? Oh yes…we do have another future addition to the rodent graveyard–but since Lullaby is a very sweet rat, who has shown no inclination to pick our noses or bit our toes–behavior other, more deceased rats have exhibited–we are not going to mention her final resting place out loud.)

To the right, on the side of the chair, you will see that our very own Needletart has, in addition to the EXCELLENT picture of Cory’s tattoo (which I’m going to frame and hang in the place of Peja Stojakowicz, who no longer plays for Sacramento), and a skein of pima cotton so gorgeously green that I’d swear my main character was named after THAT YARN, and not the color found in nature, also sent me one of her wonderful sock kit bags–with a little emergency knitting kit that is just perfectly DARLING…it includes a measuring tape (on the side of the bag) a crochet hook, little scissors, and a…dollar bill? When I asked her what the dollar bill was for, she told me that it was a measuring device for socks–I assume for when to start the heel, which I thought was completely ingenious! And, of course, if the sock isn’t working out, it will buy chocolate, which is also ingenious!!!

Thank you, my dearest of internet friends–I’m like a little kid when I get your packages–I can not tell you enough how much your kindness (and sense of humor) has enriched my life.

Now, you are wondering, what in the Sam Hill is the rest of that shit? (Hey–I have to keep that R rating, right?)

Anyway, I have, in my typical summer Cast-On orgy, begun a number of projects–now I always finish these, but some of you may remember the dress I cast on in August that I cast-off in April… it will take a while…

So we have…to the very very left, a pair of socks from the Nancy Bush book ‘Traveling Socks’–they are done in Mountain Colors, Mountain Goat–I highly recommend it. It’s like knitting with the wool equivalent of swiss dark chocolate…I actually had to put them away because I just stopped and got hypnotized by the wool. Right above those are, you guessed it, Monkey Socks, done in Claudia’s HandPaints–colorway, ‘A Walk In The Woods’–and, again, I’m besotted. Then there are the self-striping vanilla socks (which I must finish because I’m beginning to loathe them, just because they’ve been around for so long) and, in the middle… an alligator sweater for the Cave Troll. I’m designing it myself, and I’m so thrilled with the way the colorway worked out that I’m pretty unliveable when I work on it. (See that purple, dear? It matches the purple in the variegated…doesn’t he look like he’s swimming in his own little swamp? Doesn’t he dear? Why, I’m just damned good, really…) Now you understand what I mean–hubris like that is gonna get me bitch-slapped by the knitting Goddess, but good… but that’s okay, because the back of those alligators is a rookie nightmare of weave-ins and floats that are too damned long… let’s just call them my little bow to my own humanity and leave it at that.

All that, and a scarf that’s 1/2 done (I guess I’m saving the other 1/2 until Christmas) and you see that, yes, I can still retain the word “knitting” on the blog. My favorite LYS enabler will be so proud:-O)