Ooh…that wasn’t promising…

(Zoo pictures from last week–I did promise and all…)

Okay, just to warn you, first of all, I’m going on a blue rant here–I mean, I just read my 3rd paragraph and it gives Cory a run for her money, so if you’re not comfy with that sort of thing, I’ll forgive you for not reading…I’m pissed, and I just had my 1st glass of wine in five years–no, I’m not an alcoholic off the wagon, I’ve just been pregnant and nursing and mostly I just never drink and so when I opened a bottle to marinate a steak a part of me said, what the hell? I mean, don’t people actually DRINK this shit instead of use it for London Broil rescue? Anyway, it relaxed my inhibitions and…well, I have an F-word and know how to use it.

So, back to the subject of my rant. I logged on to blogger tonight and the time lag was, well, reminiscent of my computer this whole last week at work. Not promising… in fact nothing about this week was promising…I’ve spent 3 days (I count Friday) scheduling a freaking movie right before progress reports so I can add shit in and what happens?

Well, the fucking maching DIDN’T stand up, walk out of my class rooom and shout “I’m all right, Jack, screw you all!” But it did laugh at me as it timed out every time I switched classes and the internet broke twice and…okay, the list of ways our fucking computers barfed cubits all over us is almost as long as my yarn inventory…and so I gave up. I mean…I just said, “Fuck this machine, fuck this place, fuck it all…I’ll teach my lessons but grading their work? Fuck that.” I sat up in front of the class and knit while they did seat work or watched their movie or trashed my room. (What is that? What in the fuck is up with leaving shit all over my room because, hello, I’m too busy keeping the little bas-turds from killing each other to worry about paper wads…btw? This last part? Is almost all my 6th period. My 12th grade AP class. I hope 1/2 the little shits flunk out of college–I’m pulling no karma punches w/these losers…I mean, you want to succeed? Learn some fucking manners and kiss my fat white ass.) Anyway, I’m starting to think maybe I should have had a lot more wine before I made my career decision…I could have written copy for diaper companies, I could have written copy for soda companies…hell, I probably could have written copy for the Berringer Wine company (since they’ve given me this moment of zen and all…) I could have spent my time with adults who know how not to litter the bottom of their floor like stoned parrots in a toxic-mold trapping cage. I could have made as much money as my husband. (Don’t laugh…no, wait,do laugh–he’s an engineer and I can’t add 2+2 to get 6…) At the very least I could have worked in a profession that knew how to party when the goddamned computers went down.

Well, I guess the week at work wasn’t a total wash…that sock that got stolen by the identity-theiving crackheaded asshole is now partially replaced.

Knitting–it CAN save the world. Or at least make moderately priced wine look like a bottle of something really expensive that I don’t know the name of.

(btw? Waiting for that first review to appear for BOUND is almost the end of my fingernails, my cuticles, and that little rough patch on the back of my 3rd knuckle. My author copies still haven’t arrived, so I can’t even fob it off on friends and family and beg them to read it overnight and give me a courtesy review…Please let it not suck, please let it not suck, please let it not suck, please let it not suck, it costs a fucking fortune, I’d feel really guilty if it sucked…)

0 thoughts on “Ooh…that wasn’t promising…”

  1. Unknown says:

    I would certainly review your book if only I held it in my hot little hands. I’m expecting it via amazon/us mail any day now. I devoured the first and second books and am seriously considering re-reading them before #3 gets here so I don’t miss any nuances. Your books are so good I can’t believe you haven’t been snatched up by a big publisher, and your books displayed in every supermarket and discount store. They are better than 95% of the paranormals out there, and I should know- I read a lot of them!

  2. Looks like everyone had fun at the zoo.

    Jobs suck at times, even the good ones. Glad you’ve made up your knitting.

  3. roxie says:

    Tell you what – why not just write that review and hold it ready in case you feel a little good press would help sales? And by the way, don’t be an idiot! Of course it won’t suck! You are not capable of writing dull, boring, sucky work. Believe me!

    Hooray for knitting while you watch the monkeys! Oh,did you get any knitting done at the zoo?

  4. Susan says:

    Only you can know when it’s time to trade up the All The Time Sucking job for an At Times Sucking one. I, for one, feel on the verge of ready.

    Ah, the blessings of a bottle of Beringer: the winemaker who brought me into the fold of St. Zinfandel, patron of All The Time Sucking Job holders.

    St. Zinfandel, we pray for your intervention in the name of our Holy Berenger, Amen.

  5. Amy Lane says:

    *Yeah…actually, I did knit at the zoo!*

    And thanks spiral and Roxie for the words of encouragement–you probably won’t believe this but I really don’t blog-onize to troll for compliments–but the encouragement really is a nice side effect…

    And St. Zinfandel might have led me astray last night, Susan–I feel pretty bad about wishing bad things on my 6th period…I don’t really want them to flunk out of school, I just wish they’d stop trashing my room while I interpret MacBeth!

  6. penguinpants says:

    Bound didn’t suck. On the contrary, it was wonderful. I ordered it from the publishing company on the first day it was available and paid nearly as much for the shipping as I did for the book. It was so worth it. It arrived yesterday morning and I spent most of the day and night reading it. Couldn’t put it down. I laughed out loud in some parts and sniffled at others. I had been waiting eagerly for this book and it didn’t let me down. It was all I hoped for and more. Now I have a long, hard wait until the next one. I wish you had a discussion forum so that your fans could meet and ponder your books. It would make the wait for the next one easier.

  7. Amy Lane says:

    Oh…wow…Okay–knitting people? I had NO idea how many people were reading my blog for the books…I’m well flattered, pleased and a little bit *aww, shucks, really?* embarrassed:-) You know–Squiddoo, Library Thing and Bookmooch all have places for discussion forums (for that matter, so does amazon.com)…if someone started up a discussion on one of those sites, I’d probably be embarrassingly eager to chime in. I’m also happy to discuss stuff on the blog… and thanks so much, penguinpants–I’m totally thrilled. People like it–they really really like it and I’m really feeling much more optimistic about writing and life in general…thanks!

  8. Rae says:

    Well, sorry Amy, that’s your first mistake. Haven’t you heard of pump and dump? You CAN do it. And actually, why waste that precious breast milk? Give it to the kiddies. It’ll help them sleep better. I promise, speaking from experience. 😉

    That’s some serious suckage, Amy. Time to get the karma working in your favor. Be nice to it? No, kick it straight in the ass and tell it to shape up or ship out. You’re the boss, dammit.

    Summer is only a couple of months away. Time for some serious reflection. Time to update that resume. Time to look out for number one — YOU, m’dear. You’re Number One.


  9. Rae says:

    Wait! I checked the !@#$% blog today. How did I miss this post? You posted when I wasn’t looking?? Ack! 😉

    Sorry. Now I have to go back and read.

    I think I had one cocktails too many.

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