Predictably, we’re late…

Mate:  Sum of Us?

Me: Politics. Or charity. Or sort of both.

Mate: Got it.

Mate: Avaaz?

Me: Politics. Or charity. Or sort of both.

Mate: Right.

Mate: Vistaprint.

Me: Work.

Mate (to self): Advertising…

Me: Sure.


Me: Self-medication.

Mate: Lots of those when your books come out.

Me: Do I SEEM less neurotic?

Mate: I could make a case, but no. Not declaring it.  T-Fury, Tee-Spring, Zazzle…

Me: I was seduced by the internet.

Mate: I can’t declare that.  Project Trevor?

Me: Charity.

Mate: Mod-Lily, Roaman’s, Women Within…

Me: Uh, clothes?

Mate: Work related…

Me: Just not the pajamas.

Mate: That’s a uniform.

Me: Fine. Work related.

Mate: Loopy Ewe?

Me: Self-medication.

Mate: Ah.

Me: Wait! No! I made things! Work related things! We can declare those! I have pictures! There were blog posts! It’s… uh… public relations!

Mate: Yarn. As advertising.

Me: Sure.

Mate: $280 in Kansas City?

Me: Uh… oh! The thing!  The thing! I went to the thing!

Mate: *.*

Me: Uh, the uh, panels and people and cosplay and Robert Silverberg and…

Mate (to self): Conference…

Me: Yes! The thing!

Mate: Sure.  This guy here? Who’s name I’ve never heard of?

Me: You’ve heard me talk about him all the time– that’s Andrew Gordon.

Mate: Sure. This guy here?

Me: We know him too. That’s work.

Mate: And this?

Me: Yeah, we know him too. That’s advertising.

Mate: I don’t know any of these people.

Me: You’ve met them all!

Mate: Under different names. It’s not my fault.

Me: Of course not. What else?

Mate: One more T-shirt company.

Me: That was after the election–self-medication.

Mate: I’m not declaring that. Corbin Fisher?

Me (without batting an eyelash): It’s research.

Mate: Is Adam and Eve research?

Me (blushing): Uh, no. That’s an, uh, personal expense.

Mate: Unbelievable.

Me: It’s cheaper than Xanax.

Mate: Word. I’ll leave you alone now. Go do your job with a computer and a blank page.

Me: Sure.

So, see? Taxes.

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