The things you forget about birthday parties…

*  Cleaning house is a family endeavor

*  It usually lasts beyond the party

*  Other people’s children are a lot louder than yours

*  But sometimes a lot more fun too

*  Taking middle schoolers bowling can be terrifying

*  That one kid looks like he’s gonna loop the ball right into someone else’s lane

*  You’re a much better bowler if you pretend the pins are members of Trump’s cabinet

*  Yes, I smashed the horrible and inhuman Alt-Right today on lane 6 at the AMF, why do you ask?

*  You always order too much pizza

*  The only thing more frustrating than ordering too much pizza is when relatives show up early, eat their own pizza, and then won’t even help you out by eating some of what you ordered for them.

* My sister didn’t eat any cake, either.

*  BTW–Ice cream cake really is much better when the ice cream is soft

*  Also? If you put an ice cream cake in an ice chest and cover it with blankets, as long as the temps are in the low sixties it will last nearly three hours without getting soupy.

*  Your friend really is your friend if she helps you eat some of your leftover pizza

*  You like her kid better too

*  Plans to say, edit or write after the family crashes in a post bday coma are probably best shelved for tomorrow.

*  The blog better not go on to long either

*  Because seriously, you’ve been up since seven cleaning the damned house

*  But odds are good nobody will mess it up until tomorrow morning!

*  Night!

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