Yet Another Thing to Blame FB for…

Okay– so FB is doing this new timesuck thing… they’ve got celebrity lists, with things like, “Nine Power Couples that Can’t be Beat!” or “15 Fashion Disasters These Celebs Wish They’d Seen Coming”– and they’re addictive. I can’t read the mean ones– I refuse to click a link that says, “8 Celebs that didn’t lose their baby weight!” or “Celebrities that never should have hit the screen!” but some of the more positive ones, I’m like, “Oooh, yeah– I wanna see that!” and BAM!  The website is always HEINOUSLY loaded with adds, so it slows my computer way the hell down, and WHAM! ZOOM! FUCK! There goes another ten minutes of my time that I didn’t have.

But yeah.

I know how addicting the list can be.

And to top it off, Dan Skinner (who has done some of my favorite book covers– The Locker Room, Super Sock Man, Clear Water and Bolt-Hole to name a few) asked us to name our hands down, number one teenage crush.

And BLAMMO!

Amy’s got lists on her mind again.

So I’m going to throw a couple of lists at you.  Don’t hate me.  In fact, blame FaceBook!

List 1– Embarrassing Celebrity Crushes Before I Was 20

1.  Roy from Emergency
2. Speed Racer
3. Shaun Cassidy
4.  The German Soldier from Summer of My German Soldier
5. Don Johnson
6. Bruce Willis
7. Tom Sellick
8. Captain Kirk
9. Bruce Springsteen
10. Gilligan  (This lasts one explains so much.)

List 2– Embarrassing Celebrity Crushes After 40

1.  Bruce Springsteen
2.  Matty Shultz
3. Jensen Ackles
4. Misha Collins
5. Tyler Hoechlin
6. Dylan O’brien
7. Tyler Posey
8. Steven Ammell
9. Steven Bichon
10. Nathan Fillion

List 3– 15 Characters I Keep Picturing Naked Together (I recognize these are hugely popular fan-doms in their own right, but I can’t. Stop. Looking. At art.)

1. Stiles/Derek (Shocked, you are!)

2. Dean/Castiel (You may faint!)
3. Spock/Kirk (New version.)
4. Mav/Goose (Take my breath away!)
5. Andrew Garfield’s Spiderman with Dane Haas’s Green Goblin (Or Macquire/Franco– take your pick.)
6.  McGarrett & Dano
7.  Lieutenant and Crane (Not all my fantasies are m/m)
8.  Tony Stark/Steve Rogers
9.  Winter  Soldier/ Captain America
10.  Sherlock/John (RDJ/Jude Law, OR Benedict/Martin version)
11.  Aragorn/Legolas
12.  Tauriel/Kili (Again. See not all fantasies being m/m)
13, The Arrow/Felicity (ahem!)
14. Franklin and Bash (on the other hand…)
15. Hamlet and Horatio (Don’t lie. You’ve thought it too.)

List 4–11 things I Want to Make

1. Another Shawl For Me
2. A sweater for Zoomboy
3.  A hat for Mate
4. FINISH Squish’s sweater
5. FINISH Chicken’s blanket (possibly this week!)
6. A scrawl (scarf/shawl)  for my friend Berry Jello
7. A plain squishy scarf for my friend’s son
8. A new hat with ears for my friend’s daughter (If you detect a pattern in me making stuff for friends and friends kids, it’s that they don’t WASH THEIR EPIC DR. WHO SCARVES MULTIPLE TIMES AND THEN ASK ME WHAT’S WRONG WITH THE WOOL) which brings me to #9

(In yarn, Steve would be much more attractive from the other end.)

9. ABSOLUTELY NOT another scarf for Big T ever.  BUT a scarf to give to Becky who is donating her scarves to an LGBTQ homeless shelter after GRL.
10. Slipper socks for EVERYONE.
11. Cat-butt coasters.  Don’t ask me why. I blame Tracy Tucker-Faul on FB. (Are we detecting a trend?)

List 5– Bizarre Subjects That Appear Out of Nowhere In My House

1. How ZB got his OUTSTANDING science test scores from watching WAY TOO MUCH National Geographic and How Things Are Made.

2. What aliens in Star Wars are required to have some sort of environmental adaptation to interact with humans.

3. How the cat left a whisker in Squish’s hair after a night of hard loving.

4. How much the dog loves my tits.

5.  How much the dog disdains everyone else’s tits.

6.  How the girls at the local McDonald’s are doing– since they know me by name and all.

7.  How the team mom for Mate’s team works as a receptionist for a funeral home and it’s a rocking job.

8.  How I betray feminism by watching television shows with base misogynistic subtexts.

9.  How the boys are pretty anyway.

10.  How I managed to have a phone conversation with my stepmom about horse endowment, knotting, mpreg, and fanfic, and she finally had to bail because her embarrassment kicked in.  (I called this a win.  I also call it a good thing she doesn’t read the blog, because alas, I don’t think she’d find it as amusing as the rest of us do– which is too bad.  I’d want to know that woman in the fabric store, wouldn’t you?)

So there you go.  Remember– I blame FaceBook.  You should too!